Mastering Your Thoughts and Emotions: Essential Strategies for Success and Well-Being

Our thoughts and emotions influence everything in our lives—from how we feel about ourselves and others to our happiness, success, and the actions we take (or don’t). These factors shape how our days, weeks, months, and even years unfold. In this blog, we’ll explore common thoughts and emotions we experience and share practical strategies for managing them more effectively.

How Do We Feel About Ourselves?

As women, don’t you find that we’re often our worst critics? The way we speak to ourselves internally is harsher than we’d speak to anyone else—even those we don’t particularly like. This self-criticism can come from many sources: past experiences, learned behaviours, imposter syndrome, or limiting beliefs.

Take a moment to reflect on your week—do you celebrate the wins, or do you focus on what you didn’t accomplish? So often, we achieve something meaningful in our business, only to immediately jump to the next task without pausing to appreciate it. This allows negative self-talk to creep in because we’re constantly focused on what didn’t get done, rather than what we’ve achieved. You may find it helpful to read our recent blog Why women business owners should prioritize self reflection for more useful tips.

It’s crucial to pause, reflect, and review regularly (something we’ll explore more in November!). Recognising our accomplishments builds confidence, and let’s be honest—we are much more successful than we give ourselves credit for. So, celebrate yourself! Treat yourself to something special, whether it’s a new handbag, shoes, or a relaxing spa day. You deserve it.

How Do We Feel About Others?

Our thoughts aren’t always solely within our control. Often, external triggers, like interactions with others or something we see on social media, can impact how we feel. Have you ever had a good day suddenly take a turn because of a comment or post?

Managing relationships and being mindful of who we give our time and energy to is essential for our emotional well-being. If you find yourself in situations where you have to interact with people who drain or trigger you, it’s so important to protect your energy.

How Can We Manage This?

Protecting your peace of mind is key. If certain people on social media consistently trigger negative emotions, can you stop following them? Can you reduce the time spent with those who drain you or adjust your mindset when you’re around them?

These strategies aren’t always easy—they take practice. We may not always be able to control the situations we face, but we can control how we react. The more we work on managing our reactions, the more control we gain over our thoughts and emotions. Try this, and be sure to reflect on how it changes your experience.

It’s also easy to let negative thoughts spiral, especially when we link current challenges to past negative experiences. Before you know it, days or even weeks can pass, leaving you stuck in fight-or-flight mode, which is exhausting and unhealthy.

When you notice negative thoughts creeping in, stop and reflect. What triggered these feelings? Is it something you can change, or do you need to shift your perspective?

Let’s take an example: You’re having a great day, and suddenly, you get a message from a challenging client. Their tone puts you in a negative headspace. Ask yourself: Is it just this client that’s bothering me, or is it tied to something else in my life? How can I address the situation differently? Could it be that the client isn’t aware of your boundaries?

Sometimes, we feel resentment when our boundaries are crossed, but it’s because we haven’t communicated them clearly. Setting and maintaining clear boundaries with clients is crucial for building respectful, successful relationships.

Managing Your Environment

Another powerful way to control your thoughts and emotions is by managing your physical environment. A clean, uncluttered workspace promotes clarity and focus, allowing you to think more clearly. This same principle applies to your home—less clutter often leads to more mental clarity. When we create environments that support peace of mind, negative thoughts have less room to grow.

Are You Prone to Worrying?

Do you find yourself worrying about things that haven’t even happened yet? Or do you worry about what’s currently happening? The truth is, we can only control the present. The past is behind us, and the future hasn’t happened yet.

I used to be a serious worrier, constantly imagining worst-case scenarios. But everything changed for me in 2016 when my husband was diagnosed with a brain tumour. Our lives were thrown into chaos, and the news was so hard to comprehend. The tumour was discovered by chance after my husband insisted on further investigation—something doctors initially said wasn’t necessary. This experience reinforced something we all know but sometimes ignore: listen to your body. You know it best.

We were faced with two options: stress endlessly or take things one step at a time. We chose the latter. We tackled each appointment as it came, focusing on living life in between. Yes, the worry never fully disappeared, but we didn’t let it dominate our daily lives.

When you go through something like this, it forces you to re-evaluate everything. The small worries that once seemed so important suddenly feel irrelevant. I started asking myself, “Will this matter in five months or five years?” Since my husband’s surgery and full recovery, I haven’t found a single instance where the answer to that question was “yes.”

As Leo Buscaglia famously said, “Worry never robs tomorrow of its sorrow, it only saps today of its joy.”

What this experience also taught me is that we are so much stronger than we realise. Whatever challenges you’ve faced, you’ve survived. You’re still here. We all carry scars from our past, but we’re resilient. The more we focus on the positives and the life we want, the more the universe delivers. (I’m diving deeper into the Law of Attraction, but I’ll save that for a future blog!)

You Are Not Alone

If you find it difficult to manage your thoughts and emotions as a small business owner, being part of a supportive network like WBN can make all the difference. Connecting with like-minded women who understand the challenges you face can be incredibly liberating. Just knowing you’re not alone in your struggles can reduce the burden.

We’re excited to have guest speaker Dawn Owen join us at our WBN meeting on Thursday, 24th October, from 1:00 to 2:30 p.m on Zoom. If you’re a woman in business prone to overwhelm, overthinking, or struggling to manage emotions, this session will be hugely beneficial. Visitors are welcome, so don’t hesitate to join!

And if you feel overwhelmed and unable to navigate these emotions alone, please don’t hesitate to seek professional help or visit your doctor for support.